For much of his teenage years, Jacob lived in inner turmoil. He was unhappy, didn’t feel good enough, had not an ounce of self-confidence or self-worth, was shy, overweight, struggled with chronic allergies that knocked him out for weeks on end, had very little sense of self, and had no purpose. He was completely lost and running around in fear.

Wanting to change his situation, Jacob searched for what he thought was missing: how to lose weight, how to get abs, how to get a girlfriend, how to make more money, how to not be nervous around people, how to design the perfect life with no problems. Seriously, this is what you’d find in his search history… Although the articles Jacob stumbled across offered his situation glimmers of hope, he had no guidance and clarity about what he was doing or how to do it.

The best part of it all, Jacob kept all of this internal discomfort a secret. Anyone who knew him thought he had it all together – Jacob was top 10 in his class, a varsity athlete, a skilled pianist, very smiley, and a great friend. He didn’t want people to find out what a wreck he was on the inside. In fact, he was getting so wrapped up in creating this perfect appearance for the outside world (based on the fear that people were constantly judging him) that when all was said and done, it was he who was constantly judging himself and creating all his fears.

Never in all Jacob’s 20 years of life has anyone actually told him, or hinted at the idea that he’s not good enough, not worthy enough, or not deserving enough. It was all in his head. Through his thoughts and perceptions, he created this story of fear about himself and believed in it with his whole being so much so that it became his reality for so many years.

When Jacob realized that, everything changed.

Now, it’s 2021 and Jacob has been allergy free for the last five years, lost 40 pounds and has the body he always wanted, leaned into his authentic self and regained his self-confidence, given a TEDx talk, hosted a farmer’s market, started a business doing what he loves, has made meaningful connections with like-minded humans, and is learning and growing every single day.